The Syrian army destroys Syria in order to save it

The lion is very angry but he doesn't seem to be making very much sense these days. I don't understand what the Syrian regime thinks it can accomplish by doing what it is doing. Crush the uprising before Ramadan? Break the spirit of the people? Somehow I find it hard to believe that after four months of facing the most terrible of dangers that the Syrian people will be cowed into submission by a desperate show of force. But what can we really expect from this regime that has only managed to excel at self-preservation during the forty years it has been in power.

The Americans and the Israelis bomb the country willy-nilly, yet we don't hear a peep out of the Syrian regime. But if the Syrian people ask for freedom and dignity, well, we can't have that, now, can we? Oh no, the beloved leader is very happy to use the Syrian army to occupy Syrian cities and villages but when the Israeli army shoots Syrians on the Golan Heights then the valiant Syrian army is nowhere to be seen. This regime and its apologists have always favoured the argument of "the plan" as a justification for the humiliation and stupidity that is called the Syrian regime. If the enemies of Syria bomb it, Syria "will respond in a time and place of its choosing" (read that as never and nowhere), and when the Syrian army is riddled with corruption, sleaze, inefficiency and poor morale, we are told that the "real" Syrian army has some devastating and secret weapons that it can use, but it is hiding them from the prying eyes of the Zionist enemy. I see, is this the same Zionist enemy that somehow managed to assassinate a Syrian army general in Lattakia? Or Imad Mughniyeh in Damascus? I feel safe already...

Today, the brave Syrian army is fighting a vicious and courageous battle against ghosts that only exist on Syrian regime newspapers and television stations. This ghost is dastardly, bearded and armed. He cuts Syrian soldiers to pieces and feasts on their kidneys in an orgy of violence and terror. He puts burkas on Syrian maidens and brainwashes children to become violent religious extremists. The Syrian people don't realise how mortal a danger they are in, how deeply they have already been implicated. So the Syrian army must destroy Syria in order to save it.